As I walked into school today an older teacher and by older I mean years in the classroom as well as age...told me that she was retiring. She shook her head and muttered about the bad behavior of "kids today" and the sorry state of the school...she ended her morning greeting by telling me that she was going to find "some kind of life, she had her retirement and social security - so why shouldn't she? "This is not the life I imaged...this isn't it..."
That hit me hard because I spent the first 19 years of my "real" life in the law and banking fields when all I ever wanted to be was a teacher! So 10 years ago I quit my decent paying job and joined the ranks of the under appreciated and unloved - I went back to school and earned my teaching license.
It took three very long years...
I had to retake a number of English Classes...
I took hours and hours of pedagogy classes...
I suffered with classes of some of the most lost kids - these kids had learning issues, home issues, behavior issues....but deep inside - they really wanted to learn. Sometimes what they wanted to learn or what they wanted to know had nothing to do with the lesson plan on my desk, but even the most challenging student wanted something...
As I grew as a teacher I was "tracked" into honors classes. I left the 9th grade full of stressed out, over tested kids and was allowed to teach 11th and 12th graders...a place where an actual discussion could take place about something other the goofy preteen drama.
I just told someone last week that I wanted to Blog - I want to write, but what did I have to say? So my chance encounter with my retiring peer made me think ...is this the life I imaged?
So why blog about education? It is touchy and I do not plan to take on the unions, my adminstration or school system. This will not be a rant about the things that are lacking in education today, but simply my view on the culture of education...I really do love what I do...I really do love my students and love the challenges we face every day.
Some days this life isn't everything I wished for, but what is?
Somedays I go home defeated and wounded...some days I lose one...somedays they make me mad...somedays I want to kill them - I write them up for bad behavior, for being rude, for being teenagers - I leave it on my desk and go home and fight with myself for hours...sometimes I toss it in the trash can...sometimes I don't...
Somedays I realize how lucky I am - when I read an amazing paper from a student who has struggled or I see a child connect with a piece of beloved literature or experience something for the first time...somedays this is everything I dreamed of...somedays this is some kind of life....
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